LET’S TALK ABOUT…

…relationships and life and anxieties and grief And sex and the messy emotions

Hi! I’m Melissa


I’m a poly, kinky, queer, alternative religion-practicing woman who’s passionate about helping people go from “oh no” to “oh yes” in every area of their life. 

It’s my honor as a therapist to experience people and their worldviews. I believe my loving and affirmative attitude toward our diverse human experience is one of my therapeutic superpowers. 

I’ve been practicing in Austin for 15+ years, and I love exploring the magnificent gray with my clients in a relaxed, non-judgmental atmosphere.

Just of a few things I love to do:

  • Help a polycule work through their parenting approaches

  • Unlock the source of your anxiety

  • Work through blocks that prevent you from orgasming

  • Explore the unique challenges of a D/s dynamic

  • Provide tools to help you heal from infidelity (however you define it)

  • Help you speak up in your workplace

  • Teach you to love the parts of you that you have learned to hide

We often learn growing up there are things we shouldn’t talk about. Maybe for you that’s money, or maybe it’s sex, or maybe it’s what you’re proud of, or what you’re ashamed of.

These pieces that lurk in the shadows can cause distance in relationships, depression, anxiety, and pain as we become adults if we continue to keep them hidden. These cut off parts… these shadow parts… are where the nitty gritty or change is.

When we pay attention to them, and heal from old messages, we can make breakthroughs that will create a ripple effect across your life and community.

Melissa Hargrave in a linen shirt with a soft smile opens the front door

My mission is to help people push past ANYTHING that’s holding them back from fully expressing themselves, living a life and experiencing relationships that truly light them up.

My Approach

My approach is gentle yet direct, inquisitive and curious, solution-focused and collaborative. I will ask questions and provide a safe place for you to discuss any topic (even the ones you haven’t talked about yet).

It sounds simple, but it isn’t. Talking about ourselves is hard! It is this process, though, of talking and being understood, of noticing patterns and shifting them, that creates true and long-lasting change.

I deeply believe that you are the biggest expert on yourself. My clients are smart, forward-thinking, colorful people with storied lives. I am simply the facilitator who helps you rediscover what makes you feel whole and healthy, on your terms and at your own pace.

By fostering the belief that YOU are the author of your story, I give you the confidence to take control of your life, relationships, and happiness. Ultimately, there is no one else better suited for the job anyway. I’m there as a guide and companion every step of the way.

My Specialties

  • Improving Dating Skills

  • Mixed Orientation Marriages/Relationships

  • Polyamorous + Open Relationships

  • Asexuality

  • Monogamous Relationships 

  • Desire Discrepancy 

  • Premarital Counseling

  • Conflict + Repair

  • Improving Intimacy

  • BDSM + D/s

  • Kink + Scene Work

  • Sexual Shame + Anxiety

  • Individuals, Partnerships, and Families

  • Improving Relationship Communication

  • Dating + Relationships Of All Kinds

  • LGPTQAAA+ Partnerships + Identity

  • Coming Out Issues

  • Self-Esteem + Body Image

  • Personal Growth And Satisfaction

  • Grief + Loss

  • Divorce + Breakups

  • Infidelity in Any Relationship Dynamic 

My Credentials and Expertise

  • Master of Science in Psychology with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy, courtesy of Our Lady of the Lake University.

  • Marriage and Family Therapist- Supervisor (LMFT-S; #201306).

  • Licensed Professional Counselor- Supervisor (LPC-S; #65223).

  • MFT supervisor under AAMFT mentoring.

  • Certified in Human Sexuality through the Institute of the Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, CA.

  • 40 hours of training in clinical hypnosis from the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis.

  • 18 hours of training in ADHD and Executive Functions.

  • National Certified Counselor (NCC #295582) through the National Board for Certified Counselors (NBCC).

  • Member of the Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT; Texas-AMFT and Austin-AMFT), The National Coalition of Sexual Freedom (NCSF), The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) and World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH).

  • From Jan 2018 to the present, I have been working on my Modern Analytic Group Therapy skills through the Center for Group Studies and weekly group therapy training.

Ready to get started?

Book a free introductory call!